Monday, July 28, 2014

Oh No They Di'int: Last Wishes

Today is Monday and time again for another, Oh No They Di'int. Today's post comes to you right from my town so I hope it don't bore ya.  Around here the red tape just got a little tighter. Oh and IF the mention of paying fire and ambulance fees ever comes to your town stand up and scream NEVER. There is so much bureaucracy in even getting a fire truck or ambulance to your place in the event of an emergency. The latest drama coming from the firehouse and the city and county council is

Who Should Provide You Your Last Ride Should You Become... DOA? 

The council is screaming, not the ambulance. They say that the ambulance service is for emergencies and DOA isn't an emergency with the ambulance service stuck in the middle. So the fight is on between leaders and divided community.
Some are screaming that the ambulance service should continue to provide this hospitable service that they always provided the community, even in a time of loss. While bureaucracy says only the coroner should handle the moving of a dead body.
When my mother in law passed we just called the funeral home and they came to the house and picked her up. And then there is me who is saying Really? Shouldn't this be left up to a persons wishes especially if said DOA person has already paid their ambulance fee.

Personally I want a last night on the town Bernie style. A nice roadhouse with music and dancing and later a ride in a Monster truck with some mudding and then of course take me to the funeral home afterwards. My service should be a normal one night affair with the normal gossip you know Let'em come in talk their gossip and speculate all about it And then be cremated. This is an attempt to avoid those who show up to the cemetary grieving in their normal fashion

If I know my kids they'll get into one big fight and everything will get broken so there really won't be much to fight over after that. If you really want to test them give them something they know that you really love like a piece of jewelry and say, "I really want you to have this" Freaks'em out every time.
Why are you giving it to me now? Are you gonna die?
I say, One day we all will.

I remember a day not so long ago when the grave plot salesman came banging on my door one day against my wishes of the No Solicitation sign as big as day on my door, trying to sell me a plot like a real estate agent showing plots of ground and talking about last wishes Oh No They Di'int I told him my last wishes Bernie style. He just kept saying, "okay I am not sure any of that is allowed" apologized for taking up my time and left. Didn't really even try to sell me a lot. He handed me a folder in which to write down and plan my funeral. 

What did he mean, not allowed? But I thought it was my last wishes?

Isn't it bad enough they force all of this last planning on us now we gotta worry about how we are getting there in the first place! What do you think? Should the last ride be included in the planning?

©Gossip_Grl  All Rights Reserved


  1. That does seem like a silly thing to fight over. And paying ambulance fees? Ahead of time? Or after?

  2. Alex Both The ambulance and fire fees come around each year with your property taxes, but they say neither is a tax(?) I pay them I mean who wants to test the firemen to see if they bring wienies and marshmallows to fires that didn't pay a fee.
    Sometimes when you need an ambulance you may not see one for about thirty minutes- depends and that is whether or not you pay your fee. Thirty minutes is really important to the "golden hour."

  3. If you buy a plot now, do you get to use it for picnics, or storage?

  4. Annalisa Hilarious. Good One. Shucks I forgot to ask. I don't expect to see that fellow anytime soon banging on my door but should another salesman come a calling I will be sure to ask this one. :)

  5. We pay a 911 fee on taxes and there is the ambulance fee, which usually is covered by insurance. I remember having to pay out of pocket for an ambulance once and it was really expensive. God forbid the guy just drive me to the hospital.


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