Monday, November 3, 2014

The Disabled Hillbilly

An Irishman in a wheelchair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Irishman looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?" 

The waitress nodded "yes," so the Irishman told her to give Jesus a cup of coffee,
on him.

The next patron to come in was an Englishman with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus over there?" 

The waitress nodded, so the Englishman said to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, "my treat."

The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Redneck on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, "Hey there sweet thang. How's about gettin' me a cold glass of Coke!" He too looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that God's boy over there?" 

The waitress once again nodded that it was, so the Redneck said to give Jesus a cold glass of Coke, "on my bill."

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Irishman, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." 

The Irishman felt the strength come back to his legs, got up and danced a jig right out the door.

Jesus also passed by the Englishman, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." 

The Englishman felt his back straightening up, and he raised his hands, praised the Lord and did a series of back flips out the door.

Then Jesus walked up to the Redneck. The Redneck jumped up and yelled, "Boy don't you touch me... I'm drawin' disability!"

Resources for this post:
Joke written by unknown
Pic credit: @Google Images


  1. That would be funny except it's so sadly true...

  2. A little too close to the truth...and not just Rednecks.

    Still funny.

  3. Way too close to the truth. He'd have to find a job and quit sucking off the government.

  4. That one made me laugh. Good one!

  5. While working for 7-Eleven we had a regular customer who was a 26 y/o male. He proudly told us about his getting social security disability whenever he came in. He would yell "ya'll need to get your asses in step. Your paying for my disability"

    I asked him about the nature of his disability one day and he told me it was for attention deficit disorder. He also told me he had never worked a day in his life.

    Social Security disability wasn't his only income. He sold drugs in our parking lot.

    Social Security definitely needs an overhaul to weed this crap out!!!


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