I have been gone so long that I don't even know if anyone still comes by to visit this blog. So much has happened in just a year and especially this year. This is a year I never want to repeat. Do you ever get the feeling that you PO'd the gods really bad and now they are getting even?
That is the feeling that I have gotten starting in December of 2017. First, the motor went out on our Jeep. We had to secure a loan for repairs. Keep in mind we are still paying the note for this vehicle.
In April I had a very serious fall and broke my arm. It needed surgical repairs with hardware. Afterward ten weeks in a cast and the rest of the summer in occupational therapy and doctor visits. Yay me!
A quick note here. Jot this down real quick if you fall just let it happen. Don't try to be a drama queen or king like me and try to catch yourself by throwing your arm out. It will never happen and something is going to break.
On top of all of this happening is the in-betweens. My mama's dementia has progressed and if that wasn't bad enough on the same day I had my surgical consult with the orthopedic doctor to fix my hand and arm, my dad was diagnosed with cancer.
I have spent what I believe are the most miserable five months of my life.
On a good note, I still work at the warehouse. I went back to work with modified duties two days after surgery. The bills weren't going to pay themselves.
I still want to on some days crawl in a hole and hide, however. That would be my only vacation this year at least because I couldn't go to the beach. I might get sand inside the cast. I couldn't go camping. I might get dirt inside the cast. I couldn't go fishing because well, I wouldn't have been able to cast the pole even if I wanted to.
In the dark corners of my life, I still deal with loving a son who is an addict. Because of my addict, I was terrified to take any pain meds I mean what kind of a hypocrite would I be?
In between all of this, I think I lost the last remaining friends I had. I mean who wants to hang out with the girl with the dangly arm and that godforsaken piece of plaster and/or fiberglass mess she has to carry for god knows how long. Why is it when something bad happens that is when we realize so many things? Anyway, no use in wallowing in self-pity over it now.
My go to in the past when dealing with the bad blows that life throws at me is to write. I couldn't even do that because I am right handed and that was the hand and arm that ended up broken.
So, here I am trying to connect once again until another sucker punch from behind. Today, I am just wondering if anyone still reads this blog.
That was a crappy summer! Sorry you broke your arm and got bad news about your parents. Glad you can write again and that you're reconnecting with us here. We care!
ReplyDeleteHi Thanks for stopping by to read the update. I am just happy to have the cast off. Miserable summer with a cast. I'm still somewhat slow at typing on the keys again. :) Sorry about the gloom, despair and agony on me.:)
DeleteAs long as blogger doesn't take it on themselves to sever the link, I'll be here. I have kept praying for your son over the months, and yourself as well. Hopefully God will point you through the disasters to His will. That was a lot more than many people can take, so be good to yourself and be positive.
ReplyDeleteI have had several people quote things for instance God doesn't give us more than we can handle. I should be able to bench press a tractor trailer by now. Nope gotta build the strength up in my hand and arm first. I have no idea which lessons that all of this is supposed to be teaching me.
DeleteSometimes it's not a lesson- sometimes it's about making you stronger- like lifting that semi- and sometimes there's a sliver of pride that needs to be broken. I have had so many examples of disasters happening to people I pray for- and when I ask, "Then why am I praying," God says, "Flip the prayer! To get where you are praying for I may have to dissassemble/reassemble a lot of things."
DeleteYou need a hug! Too bad you couldn't use Dragon Naturally Speaking voice-to-text software while you were stuck in the cast.
ReplyDeleteI didn't think about using a program. Once the hard cast was on I think the only thought I had was plotting ways of getting it off. And if those typing/speech programs are like t-9 on the phones it would have changed all of the words. I did think about getting Alexa a time or two during all of these months however. :) Alexa fetch me another pillow. Alexa take the dog out. :) Thanks for the hugs.
DeleteIf even Steven has any say, you should be in for a really good year. I certainly hope so!
ReplyDeleteJoe I certainly hope so. I started burning sage on a daily basis. I am actually working on a little story about that. :)
DeleteI think you have more readers after being gone than I do and I'm never gone.
ReplyDeleteWhen I broke my wrist, at least it was the left one.
Andrew sorry to hear you too broke a bone. The only bone I ever broke was my collarbone. I was two. I can't remember it. I never want to break another bone ever.
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